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OH Todo, we’re not in Kansas anymore!

Not the Kansas I grew up in!
University of Kansas professor Andrea Quenette uses a racial slur in the course of her teaching and students flee. “We were devastated” reported an obviously shocked and still stunned first year Doctoral student, wandering aimlessly. Reporting immediately to the scene were the mental health counselors from the Watkins Memorial Health Center. “We haven’t seen this level of devastation since they accidently put that Mark Twain book on the graduate reading list! I don’t even want to think about all the devastation that caused!” related head counselor Selma-Walkin Watkins. The counselors, joining hands and forming the now famous “Jayhawk safe-circle”, engulfed each of the listless and bewildered wandering Doctoral students chanting the now famous “Jayhawk safe-circle” chant: “Safe circle, safe circle, you’re in a safe circle. Safe circle, safe circle, we’re in a safe circle”.
Joe Manoco, University spokesman, had this to say: “The University totally disassociates itself from any speech that may be considered disrespectful, irreverent or cause feelings of devastation amongst our student body. Singular issues such as the potty mouth rhetoric of a ‘communications’ professor, reinforce the need for body cameras to be worn by each instructor on campus to ensure appropriate and intelligent interactions with students in a safe and emotionally secure environment. The obvious emotional whiplash caused by the caustic use of a, racial slur, in any context and under any circumstance on this campus will of course be dealt with immediately. That students feel unable to continue with their studies and fear not only their professor but the kind of people who would hire her does lead us to question the very existence and mission of the entire Contemporary Communications Department. The Chancellor has instructed that until further notice, the Doctoral program in the Studies of Urban Hip Hop music and Gangster Rap is suspended until the students can be certain of returning to their studies without having to fear hearing their professors use verbally insensitive racial, ethnic or gender based slurs or derogatory remarks in their presence.”

on a lighter note: cannibal etiquette

1: never slap a cannibal on the back and say “Well Done!”

2: never ask a cannibal “okay, what’s eating you?”

3: don’t ask, everything does taste like chicken.

4: having a rabbi for dinner does NOT automatically mean

it’s kosher.

5: child cannibals are not always pickney eaters (obscure).

 

It’s official: Mecca Makes History!

tiddle-mecca

August 24, 2014

Mecca, Saudi Arabia

A twitter induced flash mob congregates around what used to be the “Kaaba”, temporarily ‘uncapped’ to make it into the worlds largest tiddley-wink pot.

As Mecca Game-meister  Adhan al Umar Bilal al Bukhari calls out to over 400,000 tiddley-wink aficionados,  “On your knees you bloody winkers, try not to scrunge!

one

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WINK!

Allah Akbar you winkies!”

Authenticated by Roland Asher Fishburn-hide, (smuggled into Mecca to authenticate the holding for the TW booklet of world records) a memorial squidger was presented, and it is rumored that  a special and video cd will be available soon.